Picture this: you’ve flagged an approach shot. Or maybe stuffed one on a par 3. A crisp, quality 7-iron that Roy McAvoy would dream of. You arrive at the green to see you have three, four, maybe five feet left for birdie. Next stop: the PGA Tour. Then, you hear those fateful words from a playing partner.
“Pick it up… that’s good.”
This is when you find out that there are two wolves inside of you. One who takes the easy way out. Who cuts corners. Who says things like “I’m just out here to have fun!” A meek little puppy dog who silently stays up on the porch when a big dog rolls through their territory. Someone who has never and will never “earn it.”
Then there is the other wolf. A competitive freak. Dawg mentality. One who would lie awake all night, staring at the ceiling in disgust had they dared to scoop up a birdie look. This wolf wants to rattle the bottom of the cup and then continue hunting for more birdies. This wolf wants to EAT.
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If those analogies were too confusing for you, let me put it in simpler terms: under no circumstances should a birdie putt EVER be considered “good.” This is something I firmly believe in, and I 100 percent think less of you as a human if you disagree.
As someone who lives in the 5-to-8 handicap zone, birdies don’t exactly come in bunches. While a slight grip change and a regaining of some much-needed pop last season provided me a ton more birdie looks, it’s still difficult to convert on them with the flat stick. And I’d argue they are even harder to convert on as you get closer to the hole. The feeling of “I have to make this … it’s a short birdie putt!” is inescapable. When you do convert, nothing makes you feel more like a tour pro then bending down to pull that baby out of the cup, whether it’s from 25 feet or 3 feet, two inches.
Why would you ever want to rob yourself of that feeling? This is something I’ll never understand as long as I live. You run into this situation mostly with, let’s face it, high handicappers who, quite literally, maybe get one or two “close” birdie looks an entire year. Almost always, these players will ask, nay, beg, “is that good?” “Come on, man, I never make one of these. Just let me have it!”
My usual retort to this groveling is “Don’t you want to make it?” In reality, the fear of missing it is too much for some folks to overcome. Which is all the more reason that it should never be given. If you think you might miss it, it’s not really good, is it?
I could go on and on, but I suspect most serious golfers probably agree with me. And the same goes for a putt to win a hole in match play, which could coincidentally be for birdie. Unless it’s hanging on the edge, we need to see it. I’m just sort of over “gimme” culture in general, born out of a campaign my good buddy Dan Rapaport started over the summer when he had me at his club in Los Angeles, where he was preparing to play in (and eventually win) his club championship this past fall. The “ball-in-hole” campaign. Just like they do it on the big boy tour. Forcing yourself to finish out every hole, be it in a casual round or a money match, will make you realize you’ve essentially been playing on Rookie mode with all those scooped up three-footers. That 78 you shot was actually an 83 in the real world. In the long run, you will be better for it. The actual, by-the-book 83 you shot will feel better than the fake 78. Trust me.
And please, for the love of God, spare me on the pace-of =-play stuff. I don’t fault groups who scoop up everything or are extremely generous in their matches with their “gimmes” in the name of “playing fast.” If you want to cheat yourself and the sport just to have the “pace-of-play good boy” label, more power to ya. I’ll still play in under four hours while finishing out and sleep soundly at night because of it.
Do you have a “stupid” golf problem? A question you’re too ashamed to ask your close friends? A conundrum that needs to be talked out in a public forum? We’re here to help. If you have etiquette-related inquiries or just want to know how to handle some of the unique on- or off-course situations we all find ourselves in, please let us know. You can email me ([email protected]) or send me a DM on Twitter/X (@Cpowers14) or on Instagram (@cpthreeve).
This article was originally published on golfdigest.com