The much-anticipated three-club finale of the official League was an unqualified disaster, at least for most guys. When somebody mentioned doing this twice a year, Klondike Cummings wanted to throw them off the deck. Looks to be a go next season.
Check Mark Garrand, The Tapper Flanders, and Russ Tee Holcomb. It was close to the end, but these guys won the Dumpster with a -12.5. Russ Tee was the leader at -5.5, and he shared the Crash and Burn trophy with two other guys.
Wynn Paradee
When something strange is done, the strange people rise to the occasion. Perfect example this week is the winning team, which was +11.5. None other than Stevie Zero Rocheleau was an amazing +9, shooting his best round of the year, a 79. Zero was joined by Hair Hole, BS Daudelin, and Dick The Warden Hislop. Zero wants to use three clubs from now on. Zero was also most over points. Winners get $10.
Photo finish for the Dumpster, with the team of Russ Tee Holcomb, The Tapper Flanders, and Check Mark Garrand coming in at -12.5. Winston, Haulin’ Dahlin, Howie Doodie Atherton, and Mr. Ed carded a -11.5. Apparently, there was a need to win the Crash and Burn for most under points as three guys tied for the honor. Ernie The Hat Flanders, Ringo Jacobs, and Russ Tee all came in at -5.5, holding off several other guys who were in the -4.5 range.
Hair Hole Bessette won the closest to pin, edging out Speed Bump Jette by a mere three feet. His 9’ 10” shot from the pin on #15 won him $34.
A team that plays with too many clubs. This week’s winners who were all on the plus side while using only three clubs: Stevie Zero Rocheleau, Hair Hole, BS Daudelin, and The Warden Hislop. Zero shot his best round of the year, a 79, and won most over points with a +9.
Wynn Paradee
The moment you’ve all been waiting for, the announcement of the prestigious Invisible Man Award. This guy played about every week this season, and if not for one lucky hole where he won a skin, nobody would have heard of him. This year’s winner is none other than…… Mr. Ed!!
Bone caught up with the emotional Mr Ed McGarry and asked him about the season and what this award means to him.
Bone: “So, Mr. Ed, a season to forget. What’s the high point besides winning the Invisible Man Trophy?”
Mr. Ed: “Well, Bone, it happened a couple weeks ago when I shanked a couple in the woods on #4. I went in and found two Pro V’s. Great for confidence, even though I lost both of them on #5.”
Bone: “Wowser. Two Pro V’s. How does this award stack up with others that you have won?”
Mr Ed. “It’s right there at the top. I won a pie-eating contest at the tractor pulls and still hold the fourth-grade record for most pencils stuffed up my nose. The one I was most proud of was the record for most balls lost at a miniature golf course. My seven iron got me in trouble.”
Bone: “You won an award for losing the most balls at a miniature golf course? And you used a seven iron?”
Mr. Ed: “Hey, that windmill and clown’s mouth were tough. I figured I needed more club. It wasn’t really an award, but a citation and a promise to never come back.”
So, congrats to Mr. Ed on his persistence throughout the season.
There were four skins this week, each paying $8. Hair Hole on #3, Howie Doodie on #9, Bone on #12, and Haulin’ Dahlin on #15.
Before the guys went out, Russ Tee Holcomb presented Winston and Lisa with cards from the League in appreciation for their work. In a statement that brought many to tears, he said, “No matter how bad we feel when we have a tough week, your writing about us makes us feel even worse.”
Kind of tugs at the heartstrings.
Mr Ed posing with his bag after winning the Invisible Man Trophy. Mr Ed was a bit emotional while stating that this award means more to him than the record of losing the most balls at a miniature golf course.
Wynn Paradee
Who won the most awards? It was a tie between Bob Shorty Ruiter and Gary Ringo Jacobs, each with 10. Iron Man Deaette and GG Gilbert each had nine.
Another season in the books. No rainouts and a lot of laughs all around. So for Winston, Bone, Mr Ed, Hair Hole, Zero, and all the rest of the guys, keep your head down and see you next season.
