The name of the game is now… fighting? Wells and Chad dive into the recent trend of fist fights on the golf course before discussing major venues and why the Players should (or shouldn’t be?) the fifth men’s major.
Then Hollywood actor, comedian and ICON Richard Kind joins to share how he got into the game as a young actor, catching a Sean Connery cheating in front of him, the time he won a charity pro-am with a sandbagging partner, George Clooney’s athletic ability, and an all-time Lee Trevino story.
Presented by @JLabAudio.
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Lee Travino used to like um mowing his own lawn. So he’s on his lawn mower and everything like that and he’s at his house and everything and a woman drives up in like a caddy or something and she rolls down the window. She goes, “Excuse me. Um how much do you get paid uh to mow these lawns?” And he goes, “I don’t get paid anything.” She goes, “You don’t get paid anything?” He goes, “No, but I get to the lady who lives here.” Welcome to the Vanity Index podcast. It’s powered by Jay Lab. I’m Wells Adams alongside Chadm. What’s up, buddy? Not a whole lot. Very excited about today’s episode. Oh my god. It’s It’s one I’ve been looking forward to for a long time. Our guest today is one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. The one, the only Richard K will be joining us in just a little bit. Richard Kind is one of the funniest people to ever just randomly run into on a golf course. It’s the last person I would expect. You know, obviously he’s Bing Bong in Inside Out. He’s been in a a million things. He actually enthusiasm. Curb. Oh my god. Uh a serious man. Cohen brothers movie. Yeah. Like one of the best roles in that movie and one of the kind of underrated Cohen brothers movies. He’s he’s fantastic in it. Just not the kind of person you’d picture being obsessed with golf, but man is he obsessed with golf and I cannot wait to have him on the show. Talk about it. What I love about Rich is I’ll see him at the course and he doesn’t have a game usually. He just kind of walks around until he sees some people that he likes and he says, “Can I join you?” And then you’re like, “Absolutely, dude. Come on.” He also loves to carry his own bag, which I really appreciate. So good. Yeah. Um he is just like one of the best people in the world. And then also like his storytelling ability, Acumen is just second to none. And you know, the drinks with him after the round are just the most fun. They’re the most fun. And he’s just he’s he’s one of these like Hollywood legends where he I think has said that he’s the most prolific actor of his era in terms of like credits. I mean, he’s got a bazillion credit. Look at go to the Richard Kind IMDb page. It’s going to have to like load five or six times because that thing is so deep. But because of that, he’s worked with everybody. I mean, he’s he’s worked with the biggest artists in the world. Cohen brothers, George Clooney, all these like super mega mega stars, then also just like the random TV episodes that he’s done. And he’s kind of like an actor’s actor or a comedian’s comedian, and he really does like live in all of those worlds. He’s just he’s got amazing range. He’s so singular and and we are just blessed that he loves golf, too. I think we’re in for it. Yeah. Um, let’s start the show with um a little segment we like to call Can’t Knock It, not brought to you by Knock Around. Um, so there’s a podcast that I listen to called The Par Train. Um, it’s hosted by this guy named Evan Singer. He lives in town and a lot of his stuff is just like um which I invite you guys all to go listen to. He’s very good. It’s all about like being positive on the golf course and like how that mental mindset can kind of like change the way that you see or um play golf. He’s also a great follow on social media and I saw him at the Masters when we went this last year and he was talking about how he thinks that what makes the Masters so special is that the Masters is played at Augusta every single year and that he thinks that every major should be played at the same golf course and it would change things. And I thought got to thinking like, “Yeah, yeah, maybe.” And I said, “Okay, where would where would they go?” And he said, “Well, I think that the US Open would go to Pebble, which I do think would be very cool every year, but then what do you do with the AT&T, I suppose.” Um, and then, you know, it it’s always going to be at St. Andrews for the Open, which would be cool, you know. And then I think up for grabs is the PGA, I suppose. Um, one of the arguments I heard about the PGA is, you know, it doesn’t really have an identity. Um, but it used to be a matchplay event. Yeah. And maybe if you brought that back, that would bring some juice back into it. God, the TV TV people hate that though. Yeah. You know, cuz you just never know who you’re going to get. You could get like some duds on the final round and then you’re just stuck with it. But yeah, in perfect scenario, I think a matchplay major would be epic cuz what a slog. It’d be like a tennis tournament, you know? You’re fighting it out to the very end. Uh, I think that would be awesome. You you can’t you can’t um you can’t knock the idea of Pebble sort of being a a permanent US Open co host course. I think that like totally makes sense. I I love obviously St. Andrew is sort of the only choice if you had to land the open championship at one spot. I think the PGA I would love to see it at at like a like a more of like a Beth Page black. think something that’s you that way you kind of have a you got something in the south with Augusta, you got something on the west coast and then you’ve got a northeast with such great fans or you know you could make an argument for something in like the Chicago area but but yeah I mean like Beth Page permit home for the PGA I mean could do a lot worse. Yeah. I mean I think the reason why we love the Masters so much is because it’s ingrained in us. It’s very iconic. you have Amen Corner and all this kind of stuff and you know every year that we’re watching the majors that’s not the masters we’re having to relearn what these things are y so I do think that there’s an argument for it now do I think it’ll ever happen no but um I I think it’s an interesting conversation I think it definitely creates you know if you were just or architecting it from a pure media value whatever if you were the masters of the university you all of a sudden had all the keys to all of golf I think you would do that actually because I think you can create cathedrals for the game that are recognizable. And part of the reason why Augusta is, you know, the Masters is the Masters is is is the golf course being a place where everybody every single year there’s history created and and the storytelling that they do around that event, putting it in context of history because there’s a tournament there every single year and every single great player has hit great shots when they’ve needed to on these exact same holes. and they’ve done a really good job of making the course play very similar as technology has progressed, you know, and they they have the resources to do that, you know, and so you’re you’re still seeing the same kinds of shots hit into that golf course the way it was intend intended to be played even with all the modern technology. I think Pebble also probably the most famous golf course in the world besides Augusta because of that because it’s been on TV every single year. It’s iconic. People recognize the atmosphere. They may not know the holes as well as they know the you know second night at Augusta but it’s recognizable. The other one I think another good argument for this is sort of sawrass and the players you know I think if you had to ask a casual sports fan not a golfer can you name three golf courses I think they would probably say Augusta they would probably say Pebble and they’d probably say Sawrass. And that’s because you see that tournament every single year you see that golf course it’s got an iconic holes. It’s got the island green. I’ I’d probably argue that the 17th at Sarass is probably the most famous hole in the world. I’d say I I think, you know, maybe people could say that about Pebble. Was it I can’t even Is it seven or eight? Seven. Yeah, I always forget it’s seven or eight. But but I think it is 17 at Sawrass. I agree. Um and and I think that you know if you did that if you again if somehow the universe came together you we were completely just thinking about how do you make this best for the fans of golf. think you do you do kind of land the majors every year in the same spot and you make it like part of the game. You know, this is the ultimate we’ve got these four courses. What’s your thought on the argument that the players should be a major? I think the players is a major at this point. I’m going out on a limb and saying that. I think if you’re now and I think they’ve it over the last 10 years it’s really emerged with the quality of winners that they’ve had with the consistent feel that they’ve had being an elite elite elite field the iconic golf course where it sits in the schedule in some ways actually I think helps it too it’s sort of the first real aggressive must-win championship you know before major season officially starts and one of the things that I think you know I think over time majors are are are not there’s not a c there’s not a definition for what is a major. It’s sort of decided and for a long time you know majors were the the um you know the Western Open was a major was considered a major tournament you know which is now the BMW championship. I mean the amateurs were considered majors way back in the day. Yeah. And a lot of that was like retconed in you know golf writers decided in the 70s that you know or 60s or 70s that that Bobby Jones’s win at the amter that counts as a grand slam that counts as a major. you know, it’s like a lot of that is a little bit retroactive. And so to me, I think that if you kind of look back, you know, and call it 30 years from now, I think the players will be considered a major. Now, will that mean the PGA is no longer a major? I don’t think so. I think they’ll just be sort of five. But I think if you were going to ask, you know, I think, okay, right now, if you ask the tour player, would you rather win the PGA? Would you rather win the players? I think they’re going to say the PGA. Yeah. But I think over time that’s gonna they’re going to get closer and closer. And I think that the uh I think that one of the kind of under uh reported parts of Jay Monahan’s legacy is going to be the the the revamping of the players and and turning it into the championship that it is, giving it the best possible chance to become a major. And and that’s a thing that never gets reported on, but Jay Jay when he took over the commissionership of the tour, which by the way, you know, he’s now on his way out. So this will be, you know, everyone’s going to talk about his legacy being how he handled co obviously and live and and you know with the benefit of hindsight I think the live stuff as chaotic and as maybe you know some of the mistakes that were made along the way I think the tour is ending up in a good spot you know it’s sort of hard to argue with the ratings and the position that they’re in financially and and from a TV rating standpoint it’s not resolved by any stretch but certainly the tour is not in any worse off place than they were you know four years ago um and so I think that history may look kindly on his leadership but the one place that I think will unexpected and maybe under reportported is it was Jay who decided to to kind of make the players the premier event and and really invest a lot in uh a sponsorship model that you know preserves its name so it’s the players championship it’s not you know the Sony championship or whatever big sponsor they would want to entitle it they take a very similar kind of masters approach of a handful of you know proud partners that support the event the limited commercials the you know pushing their broadcast partners ers to treat it like a major and all that stuff does not just happen randomly. That is intentional. And so anyway, so so yeah, I think I think you know, you’re going to look back 30 years from now, I think people consider the players a major. And I and I hope that Jay gets credit for it because, you know, it was his it was his push to really elevate that tournament. Yeah, I’ve got no problem with them doing it. And it also doesn’t change any things in terms of records like Jack would still be over Tiger and whatever. And um my other thought is is that which by the way on the records front if you’re counting my opinion if you’re counting Bobby Jones’s amter wins you got to count Tigers. Yeah that’s fair. You know he’s got three. Yeah. Anyways, my last thought on this um is I kind of wish that we could get rid of the PGA and I I might be in the minority here, but I do feel like it’s it’s the major that has the least amount of identity and you know this whole thing with live and we want to grow the game and all this kind of stuff. I really do think that there needs to be another major that is not in America and not in, you know, the UK. Y and I think to be able to drive golf into a higher echelon, it would be to put a major in the southern hemisphere or somewhere different, maybe in Asia or in South Africa or in Australia. And and my thought was, wouldn’t it be cool if the the fourth major wasn’t the PGA, but it was, you know, the the uh the Australian Open at Royal Melbourne and it, you know, it’s at an old Alistister McKenzie famous track. Um, I think that would be very cool and it would have this whole different aura and it would give that fourth one uh some juice. Yeah. Yeah. No, I I I love I I can’t say I’d be advocating for getting rid of the PGA as a major. Um, but I agree with you with the move. PGA had an identity when it was the last major and it was sort of Glory’s last shot and so it gave it extra pressure because it was like, okay, this is your last chance this year to win a major and if you, you know, in the Tiger era it was like he’s one of a bunch of it’s like, can he create the Grand Slam, you know, do the Grand Slam? Um, I feel like, but putting that aside, I think that the, uh, idea of a southern hemisphere or a global major that isn’t, you know, in the UK is something that I would imagine is going to be on the docket or at least going to be discussed. And the thing about it is there’s nothing stopping somebody from doing it. There’s no there’s nothing stopping somebody. There’s so much deep pockets in golf. We talk about it all the time. I mean, obviously like the the PIFF has invested billions of dollars into Growing Live. It’s like they could have just as easily put a billion dollars towards an event like one tournament and invited every single player in the world just decided that that was going to become a major and maybe it’s not a major when it starts but it’s got a big enough purse that you get every top player to play in it and you move it all around the globe and you call it the world championship or you call it the global invitational or something world cup. Yeah. There’s really nothing stopping anybody from doing that, I think. And and you know, somebody will have that idea and the resources and means to try and um and I think it would be a great thing for the world of golf to have something where you see the best players in the world playing, you know, truly like I you know what actually I think the answer to this is it’s the Olympics. Yeah. Like the Olympics is this and I’d say, you know, because it’s every four years, you know, you’re not it wasn’t top it’s not top of mind, but I think that the la last Olympics in Paris like that was a major. It felt like a major. It felt like as big of a deal to win that now. I think those gold medals will become majors. I think you’re going to count it as a major. I think maybe before the players becomes a major, I think the Olympics is going to count as a major. And I think that will get you Southern Hemisphere that will get you around the world. That will open golf up to a whole new audience. And it was tough because the first two times golf was in the Olympics, you had the Zika virus, you know, scare. So, so there was a lot of concerns. And then obviously in Japan, it was it was during co like no fans. So, I think seeing Paris in full flight with the big crowds with the best players in the world, it felt like a major. I think you’re going to see that again in LA at Riviera. And I think going forward that’ll be the fifth major. Well, it’s an interesting conversation regardless. Um, I don’t think anyone’s be listening to us. Maybe you actually, but definitely not me. But well, if there was any goal I have in my life, it’s that people will listen to me about things like that. We were the guys who decided that the Olympics is a major. You heard it here first. You heard it here first, folks. Uh quick break. When we come back on the Vanity Index podcast presented by Jay Lab, we’re going to have I don’t I don’t know. I I think he’s the funniest guy in Hollywood. Enrich your kind. This is an interview you do not want to miss. All right, guys. Listen up. Uh if you’ve made it this far, you’ve clearly got impeccable taste or you’re stuck in traffic. Either way, do us a solid. Hit that subscribe button, follow the show, and if you’re feeling generous, drop us a rating and a review. Yeah. And if you want to keep up with all the celebrity sandbaggers, behind the scenes chaos, make sure you’re following us on all the socials. We’re talking Instagram X, Twitter, same thing. Tik Tok, everywhere you can possibly stalk us, we’re there. Vanity Index Podcast. All right, welcome back to the Vanity Index podcast powered by Jab. I’m Wells alongside Chad Mum. All right, folks. Grab your clubs and your best oneliners because today’s guest is one of the funniest and most distinctive voices in Hollywood. Literally reading this and figuratively. You’re reading this? I did. You expect me to be off book for this? Yeah. I don’t want you to be off book. Talk from your heart. This is my You know him from Spin City, man. About you. Curb your enthusiasm. Red Oaks has a hilariously exasperated bing bong from Inside Out. He’s also the guy who can make you laugh just by sounding very stressed. And uh he still sounds stressed right now. But Richard Kind isn’t just a master of comedy. He’s also a surprisingly passionate golfer. That’s right. When he’s not stealing scenes on the screen, he’s out in the fairway trying to keep his score lower than his blood pressure. We’re going to talk about his career, his love of golf, and how many mulligans is, well, too many. And whether Larry David is the ideal golf partner or an absolute nightmare. Please welcome our friend, the always kind, Richard Kind. Thank you very much. Actually, a couple of those words were very nice and well constructed. So, thank you. Well, it’s well, it’s lovely to have you here. It’s great being here. It’s great seeing you guys. Um, you are, I think, the funniest person at our club, and I don’t think that there is a question about it. How do you feel about that statement? Okay, I’ll name somebody who’s funnier than me and he does it for a living. Andrew Santino. Yeah, Santino’s the best. Okay. For flatout funny. Yeah, he’s funny. You know what? I’m a funny guy. I’m fun to be around. Everything like that. I can act funny, but Santino has that great wit. He just knows how to turn it on. And he’s not and he could and he doesn’t always have to be funny. Yeah. You know, there there there’s people who got they go, “Oh, man. You should be a stand-up. You should do standup.” And they’re funny in the office or they’re funny, you know, when you go out to dinner. But you put him in, you know, in front of an a light or in audiences or turn the camera on. He’s hilarious. I I’ve been lucky enough to play with you guys a few times. We’ve had a couple of great rounds and watching the two of them go at each other and try to make each other laugh. Yes, that is funny. Is like one of the greatest some I think we had Charlie Day one time in the mix on that and just the three styles of comedy kind of couldn’t be more different. And Santino told me a joke and I’m a really good joke teller. He told me a joke and he and he said, “This was told to me by an Englishman. You got to tell it with an English accent.” And I listened to it and it’s a great joke. It’s not good. It’s great. But no, he was so wrong. You know, I tell it in my voice. I’ve never used an English. First of all, I can’t do a good English accent. I can do an English accent, but it’s not good. But nor is his. But I tell it in my voice. So, um, so as a modicum of taste, uh, Santino is not the best, but he is the funniest. Well, can you tell us the joke? Yeah, I want to hear it. It This one’s filthy. Great. Perfect. Perfect. This is filthy. I’m not kidding. Oh, you’re going to get a lot of listeners on this one. Let’s hear it. This is two gay guys are taking the red eyee at night. Uhhuh. Okay. And one of them turns to the other and he goes, “Come on, let’s fuck.” He goes, “I’m not going to [ __ ] now. Are you kidding? We’re on an airplane.” He goes, “Ah, please. Everybody’s sleeping. The lights are off.” He goes, “No, no, no. People look.” He goes, “Here, watch. Listen to this. Here. Hey. Hey. Anybody got a pencil?” Nothing. He goes, “No, no, no. You didn’t scream loud enough.” He goes, “All right, I’ll try it again. Hey, hey, anybody got a pencil?” Nothing. So, he goes, “All right, let’s fuck.” So, they [ __ ] And then when they’re finished, they go to sleep. Next morning they’re coming in for the landing and the stewartist is walking up the aisle and she sees a guy about two rows back and the guy has mucus coming down his his nose. His eyes are red. There’s a little bit of throw up on his thigh. He’s shivering and the the the go. She goes, “Sir, sir, what’s the matter?” He goes, “Well, last night I I I think I got a little sick.” She goes, “Well, why didn’t you ask for any help?” He goes, “Are you kidding? Some guy needed a pencil. He got [ __ ] up the ass. All right. You going to keep that in? Absolutely. Are you going to Are you going to uh change it to an English accent? It does not need an English accent. No, it’s me. I tell it me. Oh my god. That’s what a start. What a This is a strong I mean opening tea shop. I think Listen, I think it’s um All right. You want to hear about opening tea? That was a great episode everybody. Thanks so much for coming. All right, I’m going to tell you something. So, want to know about golf with me? Uh, since that’s what I’m here for. Uh, I have performed at the Hollywood Bowl live four nights in a row. The producers, 18,000 people a night. Now, I belong to a golf club that you guys both belong to. We love it. Saturday morning, 9 10:00, I’m on the tea. There’s three forsomes standing around waiting to go next. I am more nervous on that tea at that time than I am at the Hollywood ball. Isn’t that freaky stupid? Yeah, we talk about this a lot actually and yeah, it’s that per performance anxiety. But I do think it has something to do with uh you know, we talk about when you have nerves, it means it means something to you and it means something that you don’t want to look bad in front of your friends. part of it. Um, okay. I’ll tell you something else. I’m going to say a statement that sounds phenomenal and it will it will not it’s still great, but it’s not as phenomenal as it sounds. I won the Bing Crosby tournament. Really? Yes, I did. When? Years after it was at Pebble Beach. Okay. It used to be the big Crosby at Pebble Beach. Crosby had it in his will that he never wanted the tournament to go um uh commercial to to to to be branded. Yeah. Well, the world changed and he was dead, but they had to honor his will. So, AT&T bought it and I don’t know how many people have bought it since then, but at the time it was the AT&T and they they had to brand it like that. So they couldn’t call it Bing Crosby’s tournament could not be at Pebble Beach. They had it at a club in either North or South Carolina. Beautiful golf course and Sarah Lee was the sponsor. It was a celebrity tournament, but it was not a proam. Uh we played with um the people who uh spent the money and uh and and there were two people. We got to split $120,000 and give it to charity. Wow. I really tried to um uh um you know protest about giving it to charity and uh you know and but we we we were able to give it to charity. I will say this, we cheated. Okay. Yeah. With a caveat. I didn’t cheat, but my partner was a vice president of Sarah Lee and he claimed to be a 26. He was a 14, 15, maybe a 16. There was a par three that was uh 200 yards over water, but because it’s this tournament, they moved it up to 150 yards. That was in the area code of the water. He put it on and uh made birdie for a zero as if we had played 17 holes that day. So we cheated. We didn’t cheat, but we cheated. I didn’t cheat. I was a pretty good golfer then. Coming in, all I had to do was bogey the last hole. The day before, I’m telling you, this 18th green was at a 45 degree angle. I for putted it the day before. It was so difficult the pin placement. It was so tough. I’m about Well, this is really pathetic, but this is how I how I far I hit a ball. I was and I was a good golfer at the time. I I was 140 out 40 yards out. That’s an eight iron for me even at that age. Um and I all I had to do was get it on and three putt. I stood over the ball. You could see the muscles in my forearms rippling and there was a crowd. So you talk about nerves. I was terrified. I stepped away from that shot three times to just loosen just loosen just get rid of the wand. I hit it dead square. You know, it was perfect. And I hit the the ball. It landed about five inches short of the hole. The whole crowd went, “Oh, like that.” And I went, “No, no, no, no, no.” Yesterday I for puted this and we won the tournament. So that’s a story. Not as good as the joke, but it’s a story. Did you get some nice hardware for that one? I bet that’s a cool trophy. I still have the crystal lamp, the t, you know, the the what’s the Irish crystal the um Waterford Waterford Waterford lamp and a Waterford trophy. Oh, it’s gorgeous. Now, here’s the crazy thing. Everybody, you getund $60,000 to to give to charities of which I have many charities that I give to. Everybody comes up. I have this charity. Would you mind just giving some of your money to Would you mind? Just $5,000 would be great. Just, you know, and it was astounding how many friends I found out I had. Do you remember who you gave the money to? Yeah, some of it. Well, Project ALS was very uh big for um uh because my my wife, my ex um was executive director for Project ALS. So, of course, we gave money to that Michael Fox’s uh tournament. Um you know, I’m we could talk about my stuff and people would say, “Well, why do you give to that? Why don’t you give to this charity or something like that?” I have about 20 charities that at the end of the year I give money to. So, you could look at that. That’s wonderful. Yeah. Yeah. I’m I’m a good man and yet I’m cheap. Um, we usually start the show with asking our guests what they’re I’m sorry I didn’t even let you start the show. No, no, no worry. I’m going to take over the show. It’s going to be there’s going to be three of us by the time we we get to the golf channel. We would love that. Oh jeez. Are you kidding? Okay, go ahead. Um, what is your index? What’s your current handicap? It’s not good. Talk about cheating because I’m better than this. Mhm. I’m a 212. Okay. It’s horrible. Horrible. What’s the lowest you’ve been? Uh I I was a 10 10 handicap. I never made it to nine. Never made it to a nine handicap. Um the thing is, and I determined this the other day, uh with this pro out in the out in the Hamptons, when I was a kid, my sport was tennis. And I used I used to have I was a fat kid so I didn’t want to run and get you know have to go hit the ball. I wanted to hit winners all the time. I had the best crosscourt shot you’d ever seen. It was a bullet. It was direct. It was about two feet short of the baseline and it was just on a for on an angle. It was great. But to hit it, I had You can’t see it, but Well, that camera can. I had to turn over my wrists. Yeah. Okay. Top spin. And put top spin on it. Now, when I have a golf swing, I go over like that. And unless I’m careful, I’ll pull the ball. I’m lazy sometimes. I’ll pull the ball anyway. I’m not a good athlete, but somehow I hit the ball after all these years and but what happens is I release the club before I get to the ball. Mhm. I know what you should do and my brain will not let me. Isn’t that crazy? Y I cannot go like that. I gotta go like that first because of all those years of tennis and that’s how I hit a ball. I’ve begged somebody here to teach me and I’ I did get somebody at uh out in the Hampton sort of got me to do it a little bit. It’s not great. I still don’t hit the ball the way that I I should, but I’m closer. And all of the stuff that other teachers have said make make sense to me now. Um, but he he’s the one who who said that that that’s what I do. And it’s it’s I think it’s because of that. Well, this is my miss, too. I tend to turn the ball over a lot. And that big snap hook is what Oh, do you really? Oh, yeah. Well, because Wells, when I think of you playing golf Yeah. I mean, you you’re you are a beautiful naked woman in your golf swing. That’s how good your golf swing is. Oh, thank you. You’re a very good golfer, Chad. You as well. I’m going to stop there. You guys are great. I’ve got a a a member guest this Friday and Saturday. I’m terrified. I am going to I’ll either play great or Paul I’ll mention my friend Paul Lowour. Please excuse me, Paul, if I really screw up. I’ll never guess. And you know, I’m I’m scared. I I I I don’t know. I haven’t I haven’t hit a ball on grass. Well, you’re getting 22 pops, right? So, that’s I I know. Here’s the question, and I’ll ask you guys. Do I go back to my old swing for the uh There’s always the like you got to dance with the girl you brought. What a thing to say. You’re right. Well, then you get out there on the course and you kind of hit a bad shot and you think, “Oh, maybe I should change back.” And now you’re just now you’re wilderness. It’s a hybrid. I s I think my drive will be will be the old swing. Yeah. But I only hit that 190 yards, which is okay. I just can’t get to the greens in regulation. Yeah. But I chip well. I putt well. Some days I’m great. Well, you know, you talked about growing up playing tennis. We um you know, whenever you’re in town, you know, you don’t live in LA full-time, but whenever you’re in town, I see at the club, and I don’t think there’s anybody that I’ve met that loves golf more than you. and and as a as a child tennis player, how did you fall in love with golf? When did you first start playing? My dad was a six handicap when he passed away. He was a great golfer. Played for the army. He was great. He begged me to play golf. We belonged to a country club out in New Jersey. Gave me the lessons, the clubs, everything. And I said, “I don’t want to.” And my dad said, “Okay.” Thinking he was a good dad, what he should have done was said, “You don’t have to play, but you got to learn.” And today, actually, he thought that he was doing a good thing and being nice to me. He wasn’t. I am smart enough to know, and I gave my kids lesson, but we live in New York. It’s prohibitive to to play golf in New York. I should have been blessing him every time I walked off the 18th green saying I’m winning money. Now I curse him because I lose money. But I was a tennis player. What ended up happening is I moved to New York when I was a young actor. I didn’t have a I wasn’t a golfer and tennis was too expensive because I had to play indoors. I then went to Second City after four years of being in New York and I was in Chicago. I had a roommate who was from Chicago, Evston actually, and he had three friends who were golfers and they wanted to know if I wanted to play golf with them. And I go, “And as an actor, if you don’t have anything to do during the day, you tend to masturbate earlier in the day. So I needed something to do. Like I’ve never said that before, but this is good. Yeah, you’d already seen all the porn. So I was like, that’s right. I mean, oh yeah, I got to watch this again. So So I took up golf and these guys have remained my great dear friends. They are the civilians that I know who are not in so not in showbiz at all. Uh and uh I learned how to play golf then. And I mean we would gamble. They would give me 30 shots cuz I was terrible. And I took lessons and I mean they’d send a car for me. And what we would do being at Second City, I would work till 1 in the morning. Then I’d go out and have a few drinks. You know, they would pick me up at 4:30 in the morning. We would go play golf. We’d be on the course at 6:00. We’d finish by 9. They’d go to work because they’re doing that. I’d go home and go to sleep until I performed at Second City that night. We did that easily three times a week. Uh I mean, there were times where we were teeing off. There were times, first of all, there were times we would tee off and we didn’t want to do this, but there was nobody in the pro shop to pay. So, we would play for free. That’s the first thing. The second thing is we would tee off into fog. Literal fog and not you say keep an eye on the ball two feet in front of you. You would not see where the ball was and then you know within 20 minutes it would lift. But with that’s how we played golf and we would play a few times. Uh they as I say they’ve remained friends of mine. One is a lawyer in Chicago. One unhappily passed away. Uh he was a great brilliant man. Was a lawyer and then did uh pro a lot of proono work. The third guy was a guy uh who’s a dear friend. I I won’t mention his name but he married a French girl went to live in uh she got tired of living in in Chicago. Mr. family. They moved to France. He hated France. They ended up moving to London and then Wales. He was in the insurance business and he purchased the insurance company they was working for and turned it into the Geico insurance. Wow. Of Great Britain of the United Kingdom. Literally 20 years in a row, row voted best employer to work for. uh uh Admiral uh in Admiral T insurance I think it is. Um he’s overly wealthy. He’s one of the lucky people. Still lives a modest life except when he gets extravagant like he’ll get extravagant with us and he’ll take us on golf trips, weekl long golf, you know, cruise in Hawaii. You know, every year we get a golf trip. He’s a wonderful wonderful man. A I encourage you to you know what? I mention his name because he has some books that will teach you h uh how to how to form and run a business and be kind about it of which he is. But I will tell you this, he’s a hard worker and insurance you know they can be very boring but but his name is Henry Anglehart. I encourage you to read his books about business. Um they’re even entertaining when they’re not talking about business but he talks about you know about what hard work is and he works on his golf game. He’s got a beautiful swing and sometimes he’s great and sometimes he just sucks, but he’s been playing since he was a kid and a lefty. So, there you go. Yeah. You were talking about him taking you on some kind of amazing golf trips. Is there one that sticks out to you? Well, you know, Scotland’s always the greatest. Castle Stewart is my favorite. Playing it in that wind, the 18th hole, where we literally are shooting uh almost uh sideways and it gets to the green. Uh, so I loved that. I remember we had two guys who were driving us around in the, you know, in the in the vans and they were Scottish and you know they you want to get you know you want to you want to play around and we’ll we’ll bet something and you know 50 pounds or whatever it was and we did and we slaughtered those two guys. We killed them and they did not pay up. Ooh. Oh, they paid up by giving us a ball marker like a, you know, an engraved, you know, like a they bought a ball marker. So, yeah, they didn’t pay their debts. And, you know, I know the Scots are cheap, but, you know, but a man should pay his debts, but hey, they were driving vans and I I give them a break. They were nice guy, great guys, but I asked me what they look like or what their names are. I don’t know. But they didn’t pay their debts. Interesting. And that’s right. You want to hear a great a great they didn’t pay the about cheating story. Yes. Yeah. That’s what they’re here for. Now, not everybody’s going to like this story because it’s a it’s a it’s an icon. An icon. I’m not kidding. It’s an icon. I’m playing Sherwood one time. Like I said, I was a good golfer at the time. There was a day I was and um Sean Connory is playing there now. He’s a member there and he’s playing as a tusome. So, we’re at the fourth hole. It’s a long par five. And uh there’s water on the right. Okay. We tee off. Of course, we’re going to let Shan Connory. We It could be a six and we’re going to let Shan Connory go through. I I didn’t spray my ball, but it was off to the right. Okay. Sean Connory comes up, hits his ball. Not a good shot. Flares it to the right. It’s in the water. We all know it. I go up after after they go and I go to look for my ball and my ball isn’t there and I look where at the time I was hitting it as far as he was and we look in the water and there’s a Sherwood ball and I told my son I mean he pulled the gold finger. Yeah, I was gonna say this is from this is from well the goldf figure and I told my son I don’t think Shan Connory if you asked him the next day could tell him could tell you who he played with or how he played or what he scored or how much money he won. But for the rest of my life Sean Connory cheated. Yeah. And he know and like he might not remember the round but he remembers doing that. Oh yeah. He doesn’t remember doing that. I don’t know. Cheating is feel like something is burning your mind. Two guys playing. He doesn’t. But that might have been his character. Yeah. That might I mean he was known for hitting women. It might be his character. Yeah. Who’s the um who’s the most famous sort of icon that you’ve ever played with? So we had Sean Connory playing through playing your ball. You’ve been around entertainment for so long. Oh. about the famous people. Sure. Well, I never mentioned him, but I guess George Clooney, he’s my best friend, but I’m not going to talk about him at all. Okay. By the way, he’s a very good golfer, but he’s good because he’s a Okay, I’ll I’ll talk to him. I’ll talk about him nicely and people will like this. He’s a great athlete. Ridiculous. He was a great ball player. Tried out for the Reds. That was his goal. He thought he’d play for the Reds. That’s how good he is. So, of course, he has a baseball swing, but he swats it. Great putter. Um, stopped playing as well when he threw his back out doing Syriana. It hurts him a little. And so, there are days when when he’s not, but he enjoys the game. Uh, but he’s not a student of the game. It’s just natural talent. But, he’s really good. Um, but I guess the most famous Oh, I mean Oh, was somebody who won the the Oh, he’s a great guy from Texas, the golfer. Yeah, I have him in my in my from Texas. He’s a Texas. Lee Trovino? No, no, that was that was that 15. You want to hear the best story about Lee Trevino? There’s my favorite story about Lee. Lee Trevino used to like um mowing his own lawn. He had just was Do you know this story? No. Likes he liked mowing his lawn. He was on his lawn mower and everything like that and he’s at his house and everything and a woman drives up in like a caddy or something and she rolls. I guess on this show you got to say the Cadillac because caddyy has a different meaning. So this rich woman, you know, rolls up in the uh uh Cadillac and she rolls down the window and she goes, “Excuse me, um how much do you get paid uh to mow these lawns?” And he goes, “Oh, I don’t I get I don’t get paid anything.” She goes, “You don’t get paid anything?” He goes, “No, but I get to [ __ ] the lady who lives here.” Oh, that’s amazing. Isn’t that a great story? That’s such a great story. I know. I know. I got to spend some time. Pat Perez. Oh, Pat Perez. Patz. Yeah, Pat Perez. I knew I’d get it eventually. That’s You guys are young. What I just went through, it’s coming for us. Oh my gosh. You have no idea. Oh, tick tock. Tick tock. Oh my god. Oh boy. Yeah. But it it comes to you eventually. Uh Pat’s a character. A character. Oh yeah. So I loved playing with him. I played at the hope with um oh the guy who wears the the hat to the side um Frenchman is that’s right yeah partnavic yeah so I’m playing with partnavic and he’s playing terribly I’m playing out of my mind well he like forgets his game and starts reading my putts he’s more concerned with my game than he was with his he was a lovely man my favorite story uh what every time I think of Yasperik you’ve played Wilshshire in Los Angeles, of course. So, the ninth hole at Wilshire, um it’s a famous, you know, par4 kind of up and over a hill and it’s a blind t-shot and in the background you can see the El Royale Hotel or it’s the L Royale, I think it’s a hotel. I think it’s an apartment building, but you see the beautiful El Royale and every single time you stand on that tea box, the caddy will tell you the same exact story about the time that Ben Hogan came to the tea and he asked, “What’s the line?” And he said, “Oh, aim at the E in L Royale.” And Hogan, of course, says which E. you know. So, so that’s the setup for the story. I’ve played Wilshshire a bunch. I love that course. Um I’ve heard but but no. Okay. Go go go. Was it the Hollywood sign? Maybe. No. No. They said aim towards the windows and he said which because they were like window cut you like he goes which window which window. So So that’s the setup, right? So I’ve heard that story maybe like 10 times. The two the two stories you hear at Wilshire are that story and then the time that I think Howard Hughes landed his airplane on the course to go sleep with a paramore of his uh and just left the plane on the course. So anyway, so I’m playing out at Hillrest, first time ever at Hillrest and we come around the corner and there’s a very similar blind shot and in the background is a bunch of skyscrapers in Century City and there was an MGM sign that was on the top of the window and I’m just like asking the caddy what’s the line and he goes, you know, funny story. One time Yeser part of was here at Hillrest and he comes to the tea and he proceeds to tell this exact same story. He says what’s the line? He says aim for the M and MGM and he goes which M. And and I’m like of course it’s Yasper Parnovic in that story. And I guess we have one of those at our club. I’ve heard recently I’ve heard a Tiger story. What on uh on number 12 maybe? Uh there was a story that Tiger had played when he was an amateur or or it was a young professional and and there’s you can see the NBC Universal building and this is another you know same thing like which window and I’m like are these all this apocryphal story is now applies to basically any great golfer but I love that in the pantheon of those stories you get Ben Hogan you get Tiger Woods and you get Yasper Yasper. Yeah. Although you know that the T- markers at at Wilshire you know what they are the Yeah. Go ahead. The No, you because I can’t remember the word for them, but they’re they’re drill bits. Drill bits from Howard Hughes’s factory. From his factory. Oh, yeah. That’s right. Yeah. So cool. Iconic T- markers. Where did he land that plane? I I think it was on eight is what I was told. An eight. Huh. Okay. Yeah. There is nothing quite as awesome as a post round drink with Richard Kind when he starts telling jokes. Like it is nice of you. But it is a very iconic. Are we just Are we just talk just talking, you know? So, uh, yeah. I just I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. Do you play anywhere in New York? Do you have a club up? I don’t I don’t belong to a club. I’m lucky that I have friends out in the Hamptons I get to play with. I am lucky that um there are people who have clubs. Oh, I I have a a small very modest house house out at the Jersey Shore, but I play the public. I play the public courses all over. I play a place called Cherry Valley in in uh in the Hamptons uh that’s in Riverhead. I’m very lucky. There’s a wonderful course called The Bridge. It’s wonderful. I happen to be friends with the man who owns the club. He is as gracious to me and I try and do good things for him because he’s very uh very charitable and I try and help out all of his charities. He has a magnificent, you know, about this about his golf golf charity for young inner city kids up in Harlem. He’s he’s a great guy. I’m going to mention his name because he does great things. He has a foundation and he takes these these kids from from Harlem and and the inner city and not only does he teach them golf after school, the people who teach golf, mentor them in their homework and then those kids get to come and work at the bridge during the summer and see what they can aspire to. I mean, they’re magnificent kids. It’s a wonderful foundation. Bob has Bob Rubin and he just does magnificent work and he has a magnificent golf club. The Bridge Golf Foundation. The Bridge Found Oh, people should look into that if you want to want to know something. Talk about some place to give your money. That’s one of the places I give my money. Yeah. Yeah. It’s wonderful. Are there any um golf like Are you a guy that goes on golf trips other than going out to Scotland with your extremely rich No, I’m I’m a I’m a uh No, I I don’t. Yeah. Um I’m going to tell you something about golf that people, like I say, I’m cheap with myself. I’m generous with others, but I’m very cheap with myself. I don’t think golf should cost more than $200 a round. And I hate paying $200. Yeah. I don’t think so. I won’t play Pebble Beach anymore because of the strangle hold they have on your wallet. Yeah. In order to play there. Not just the cost, the caddy that you got to stay at the at the lodge. No. No. No. No. No. Yeah. No. Not right. I mean, we all know it’s an elite sport. It doesn’t have to be. You go to Scotland and you get off the train. You’re right there at Trune, isn’t it? True. Where you just get off the train? Yep, it’s right there. That’s how you should play golf. Uh, what does it cost? $60 a round. Maybe maybe some of these places are gouging them and they’ve learned their lesson, but it’s a it’s it’s a if played with Okay, you want to hear a great story? I do. Because I think it happened at Trun. Uh, I took a caddy at Trune. Okay. And in Scotland, a caddy only carries one bag, which is great. I don’t mind. But so I I have my caddy uh and I’m I get set up because I’m alone. I play with uh an American and his son and they have a they have a pull card. Okay. So we’re on the first screen and I ask my caddy uh uh you know which way does it break? He tells me. So the American says to the caddy, “And which way does mine break?” He goes, “Why don’t you ask your [ __ ] trolley?” So, I like that. I like that very much. Yeah. In the UK, you know, it’s much cheaper to become members of these golf clubs. Not just a member of a golf club. It’s it’s what what’s the word? It’s a it’s it’s a working man’s sport. Here, it’s an elite sport. That’s not right. Why not let everybody play? I think that’s what it should be. And the Hampton’s is it’s verboten. I don’t think there’s a club out there that costs less than $750,000 to join and that’s often their second club. Yeah. And that pisses me off. We you you know, you talk about being uh cheap. Do you like to gamble on the golf course? I love it. Yeah. But for money, if I lose a hundred Well, okay. First of all, here’s my my attitude towards uh um gambling. I used to be a really good poker player. I’m not any good anymore because I have three kids and now my three kids are in college. So, there are consequences to their lifestyle or anything. Of course, it’s not. But I love gambling. I don’t want I don’t like big gambling. I could stand over a putt for a dollar and I’m scared because it means something. So, give me a 5510 game. the 5510 game is has gone the way of all, you know, of all buggy whips and and it’s now 10 1020 and it’s this and and that’s and you know, when you’re losing $400, that’s that takes the fun away from me. I don’t like standing over a putt for that much money, but to me, a dollar is a nice amount. $5 a little better, but uh I like I like consequences and I like being punished. And golf is different if you’re gambling. Yeah, it’s a different game. It’s as different going from the blue te’s to the white te’s. It’s as different from going out there with nothing and versus $5 is on the line. I’ll lose 100 150. I don’t mind that. But it’s it’s gotten bad. And then you can’t put the toothpaste back in the tube. Once you’ve gone to those stakes, it’s tough to go back. Yeah. I I I feel the same way. I really Yes. I look at the house we’re in. I know. Well, my wife does well. Um, someone asked me outside, uh, you know, when I was cleaning the the garage, I said, “How much you charge me?” I said, “I [ __ ] the girl outside.” Sometime Okay, let’s not go there. Um, no, I I agree with you. Like, I don’t like the juice to change how I’m playing. And when something gets really really big I I do but but no no no no I like the juice to play to to change how I’m playing. Okay. What it means but when the juice gets Okay. Continue your sentence now. Well when I when I’m like concerned about the dollar amount then it then it changes the fun. That’s not fun. Yeah. Yes. I like the juice to change the way I play but I don’t like the juice to change my happiness. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I will tell you this too. I win $80, of course I’m happy. I lose 10. Oh god. Oh, why? I I go home. I think about it. $80 does nothing to change me. Yeah. It’s not the $10. It’s the Ah, I lost. Yeah. I I hate losing. I hate losing more than I love winning. Did you ever get in a really big game and feel like, whoa, I’m over my skis? Because I think we’ve all I mean, we’ve all been there for sure. We talk about that a lot on this show. No, you’re smarter than I. Good for you. Yeah. Well, hey, listen. We want to be respectful of your time and I know that you got to go to the SBS tonight. Are you presenting out there on stage? Here’s what I say. Okay. They invited me. Yeah. it. I’m not saying it’s a bucket list, but all of a sudden it became I didn’t ever thought I’d go to the SPS and all of a sudden it became a bucket list thing. Oh my god, I I I’m sort of famous for a moment. Next Tuesday, this may all be gone, you know, but yes, I’m admired now and people watch me and maybe they know my name. I’m telling you, it’s it just goes. It goes, you know, uh so if they’re inviting me, I better take it now. Yeah, I had best take it now. So, I’m going. I’ll have a great time. Um, before we let you go, you have some time for some rapid fire questions. Yeah, love it. Love it. All right. Um, rapid fire questions on the Vanity Index. Will they be a rapid answer or are they rapid questions that you want to answer quickly or do you want a story? We would love stories. Yeah, if you’ve got a good story, but there’s a lot of them. So, if you don’t want Okay, it’s okay. Um, let’s see. Uh, do you like to walk or ride? Oh, I will only walk. Really? only walk. Um because first of all, getting into the cart, I plop. That’s bad for my back. Um taking bumps will hurt a back. Um and then getting out of a cart, you like your memory. You’ll find out it’s getting out of a cab is the worst thing. That’s the first reason. The second reason is I believe being uh uh you know, very loyal to golf or what’s the word? I’m pretty conservative. Golf is a walking sport. Third thing, it’s a walk in the park. Literally, it’s a literal walk in the park. Walk the course. That’s what it’s good. And then saying, “Oh, take a card. We’ll play faster.” You don’t. You don’t play faster. And scrambles. Do not play faster. Uh, and the fourth thing is is I like to carry my bag. Really? I have a walk. You see me carry my bag all the time. M I love carrying my bag. I It’s like carrying a briefcase. It’s it I If you get a bag good enough, it’s like a briefcase. Maybe it’s what How much is it? Six pounds. Yeah. Six pounds. Six pounds. You put it on your shoulder. It’s the lifting up, which is the initial, but then you walk, it’s nothing. Uh walk, walk, walk, walk, walk. Um traditional traditionalist. That’s what I am. A traditionalist. I think a a golf course should be walked. What is your biggest golf pet peeve? Bad golfers worrying about their score. That’s a pet peeve. I say don’t count up your score. Count up the number of good shots you made during the round. If you can do more than 40, good for you. It’s great advice. Favorite course you’ve ever played? Um, I still love Riviera. I think Riviera is just the best. the best. I’m sorry that it’s changed in personality of members and everything, but uh um RIB is my favorite and it plays to my game. I don’t know why. I just I love it. I love it. We’ve heard that answer a few times. It’s one of my favorites. Um one course you’d love to play. I would like to play Cypress. I’ve played I played all the others and I’d like to play Cypress. Um have you ever been in a movie where you played a golfer? Yes. Really? either a movie or TV show. Well, certainly curb. Yeah, I’m saying like a professional. Look at me. Can we diverge for a second? I want to hear about playing golf with Larry David. I I’ll tell you a couple stories. First of all, um like everybody goes, “Oh, what is Larry?” A shockingly good golfer. Shockingly good. Oh, yeah. Okay. I’m not saying he’s a great golfer, but for what you would expect of the man and oh, let’s laugh at Larry. Shockingly good. That’s like when anybody goes, “Am I any good?” I go, “For what I look like, I’m spectacular.” Um, he’s uh he loves the game when I was on set. And, you know, some people are he’s he’s easy to talk to. We’re friends and everything, but it’s very easy to talk golf with him like this. You know, he he loves talking golf. Um, okay. Two here. Here are the two stories about Larry. First one, the Black Swan episode. We’re playing it at Mountain Gate. It’s a hole that is, if you play it well, it’s an easy hole. If you don’t play it well, it’s tough. It’s a literal dog leg right 45° angle. He has to hit a ball and pull it so that he goes down to to have to meet the black swan. We’re going to do three takes. We’re not going to yell cut. After each one he hits the ball, we have to go, “Oh, look.” Ah, you pulled the Oh, what a shame. Oh. So then he goes down to the to the left and because he pulled the ball and action. He hits the ball. Oh, Harry. Oh, second ball. Oh god. Ah, you pulled it. Ah, what a shame. Third ball. Oh, bad shot. Ah, tough luck. Cut. Oh my god. Each one a bullet right down the middle to you couldn’t place it better for the shot in it was unbelie every shot probably because he has to pull it. He couldn’t pull it so he hit it right. It would we the crew went nuts. He hit the most gorgeous shot three times in a row. It was unbelievable. That’s amazing. Unbelievable. Second story is we were at um we were in uh Cabo playing uh uh Elorado and uh we’re playing and I’m playing with him and I happened to be having a good day. He was playing okay, but I was having a pretty good day. He couldn’t stop. or rich, you’re you’re so good, you’re great. You’re great. You’re so good like that. I’m I’m having a good day, but I was not, you know, I don’t play a great game, but like I said, for what? And I I played well, but he could not stop. He thought I was the best golfer that day. It was funny. He’s a great guy. Very fun to play golf with. What’s his handicap or around? You know, he’s got to be between a nine. I bet he’s a nine or a 12 right now. Yeah. But he plays a lot, you know. I’ll tell you, you play a lot, you get better. I I live in New York. I don’t get I don’t get to play two, three, four times in a row. Yeah. And I love playing two, three, four times in a row. I get better. I just get better. I get more confident. Who’s one person you wish you could hit the ball like? Well, everybody wants uh couples a swing. Um, who could I Who would I like to hit the ball like? Both of you guys. I I I’ I’d like I’d You want to know something? I was out on the range with one of our pros and there was a a young lady out there who I think she was a college golfer and the Grange was pretty crowded and he just turns he goes, “Well, one person has a good swing out here. I’d like to have a pretty swing.” Yeah, I really would. I’ll never have it. I I lift my I lift the club. I don’t turn. I Everything I do wrong. I’d like a pretty swing. What’s the favorite your favorite club in the bag? Eight iron. Least favorite club in the bag? Driver. Favorite adult beverage on the course. Well, I’m not a big drinker, so a a beer like a beer after a round of golf. Yeah. Is the best beer you’ll ever have in your life. The second beer tastes like swill. Yeah. But boy, do I drink a a beer quickly after a round of golf. It isn’t It isn’t late beer. I drink it. I drink it like water. It’s It’s And then I get the second beer, I sip. I don’t like I don’t love the taste of beer, but boy, that first beer. It’s the best. Have you ever had a hole in one? Yep. Three. Two of them at 186 yards. Wow. Yep. One was at Ohhigh. If you know the course, the eighth hole along the road. Uh and and there were people on the ninth T and there were people on the seventh green. Uh, I hit it perfect four iron years ago and uh, Ryan Styles was there and started screaming. It was on a rope and it landed boom boom boom in and 12 people saw it and we were screaming. That’s amazing. The second one was at a uh, club in in Connecticut 186 yards and then one was it was a hole in one. It was an executive course. There were par four. There was a nine-hole course. Par fours and par threes. It was the ninth hole. The clubhouse or the thing was at a balcony. It was 150 yards. I hit a seven iron. Went in the hole. One kid who might have been the kid who plays the banjo uh in deliverance cuz it was in North Carolina. Was on the green. I said, “You saw it. I saw it. Hole in one.” And I had a hole in one. So when you see 186 yard par three, do you start, you know, like Yeah. But you know what I don’t have anymore? And I I loved this glove was I don’t have a 4 iron anymore. They convinced me to have a rescue. Yeah. Or a hybrid. I don’t have a 4 iron. I loved my I had a two iron in my bag that I hit pretty well. Wow. Yeah. I used to tee off with a two iron. I used to have old I still have old clubs. I have my new set. Well, I mentioned it. I have a set of PXGs. Hey, maybe a new set, but they were given to me. Uh and those are my New York clubs. And then I have old, you know, burners from, I think, when Truman was president. And um, you know, that those are the clubs that I use out here. Uh, best score you’ve ever shot. Oh, okay. I shot a 7. It was It was a Was it a 76 or a 78? It must have been a 78. I don’t I’m not that good. It was a 78 uh in Florida at a at a a lovely course. What do you remember about that round? That I broke 80. Yeah, that’s what when you break 80, it doesn’t matter what score you have. Yeah. But um it’s only been a handful of times that I broke 80. I’ve I’ve shot 80 and 81 and 82 a few times. Uh quite a few times in in the in the past, but yeah, that was it. Last one. Give us one word to describe your game. I’m going to do it two times. Back when I used to play uh No, right. Now pathetic. Uh, Richard Kind, thank you so much for coming on the Vanity Index podcast. We love I I love you guys. That was a delight. You so much fun. You got to love Richard. You know, I don’t know if we’re going to survive this one. Does Does he get cancelled or do we all get cancelled? We started this podcast talking about how, you know, we’re creating we’re elevating the Olympics into a major and we’re talking about the the growth of the game. I think we went into the Richard interview. I mentioned maybe, you know, hopefully my goal in life is to be listened to about something like this. Those are that all those dreams are dashed out the window. They’re gone. We are This podcast has now been cancelled. Um but man, what an amazing that interview lived up to the hype. Yeah. And you know what? If if I’m getting cancelled for that, I can stand behind that. That’s right. I’ll stand behind Richard Kind all day long. All day long. Oh my god. What a what a legend. What a gem. Um before we go, we’re going to do a segment called Overheard presented by Jay Lab. You know, there has been this kind of resurgence. Not even resurgence, there has been a lot, well, let me put it this way. Golf has gotten so popular as of late and partially because of the pandemic and partially because u it’s cool now and celebrities and actors if you like Richard K are playing golf and it’s just in in getting a lot more people out on the course. Um, but it started to do something that might be negative, right? So, like there’s all these videos now of people fighting on the golf course. Yep. And we talked about it last week with Chris Jacobs and that like kind of hilarious fight of these two hockey players where the guy’s just like bam bam and just hitting him in the face and throwing him into a lake. And it is hilarious. Um, but it made me wonder like what does it say about the current state of golf that this is something that we’re seeing a lot of because you know the golf is supposed to be the gentleman’s game but now it’s turning into well happy Gilmore 2 I suppose. Yeah. Well, so okay so this is an interesting argument because I do feel like one is is this something that’s always been happening? We just haven’t seen it because there’s been cell phones everywhere but pretend that it’s not. I do think golf is in a really interesting place right now. And so when you know we just Happy Gilmore just came out. Hopefully everybody’s watched it and loved it. Happy Gilmore 2. And what I think was so interesting about the plot of that movie is in the the entire hook for the comedy and the butt of the joke of the first movie is really about golf and golf culture. The villain of the movie is this snoody shooter McGavin PGA Tour player country club guy with his perfectly quafted hair and ordering around you know Virginia Venet to get him his Pepsi. And I feel like the butt of the joke is golf and golf culture. And what made it funny was this idea of like fish out of water take a hockey player borish hockey player in Happy Gilmore and stick him in this like crusty rich man sport. But I think it says a lot about where golf has gone. Where the main villain in Happy Gilmore 2 is like an energy drink influencer billionaire and has nothing to do with the stodgginess of golf itself. Golf itself and the culture of golf is actually like it’s a it’s a not even really a plot point. In some sense it’s about saving the soul of golf and saving the actual heart of the game and what makes it good. Regular golf as we talk about in the movie. And I think it’s interesting because like that you couldn’t play that same joke. You couldn’t position in Happy Gilmore I 2, you know, 30 years later that golf is the butt of the joke because it’s become so accessible and democratized now and so many people are playing it and it’s become cool for the first time in a long time. And so I think just like those using those two films as kind of a a barometer of like where golf was in the 90s and where golf is today in the 20 mid 2020s I think is really striking where you know go back to your shanties like that’s what golf is now. Yeah. And and and the cool part about golf is it has room for all of it. I think there’s room for the shanties and the parties and playing in t-shirts and blasting music on the course and drinking a bunch of transfusions. But there’s also like cathedrals of the game where you can walk in and like feel the history in the old ghosts. And the traditions that apply in a place like Augusta or Cypress or National Golf Links is just different from the traditions that apply at like a a fun MUN or like you know um in the Ozarks you know that where like Tigers courses Payne’s Valley or you know or even like some of the Pinehurst courses and just like I I I love that about golf that it can contain that. It there’s never been a reason why it couldn’t. Um, and so anyway, I I didn’t mean to take the the is fighting a big deal on a golf course and turn it into this like love letter for where I think the game is now, but just we’re fresh off a Happy Gilmore and the fact that again golf was the punch line in the first one, but it it we’ve evolved so much as a sport that it’s just not at all the punch line. Uh, and the villain is just a totally different caricature of a different part of our society, I think, is is really telling. So, yeah. And I also think it’s who’s teaching new players the game because, you know, originally it was our dads. Yeah. Who come from a very old school staunchy way of playing and, you know, honor the golf course, learn all the rules, the etiquette, all that kind of stuff, which is a thing that everyone’s making fun of, right? Like especially in the first in the first um in the first film. But um I wonder if we do need to kind of get back there a little bit. Like maybe the tucked in shirts and the not blaring music on the golf course and like having a little bit of respect um might not be a bad thing to get back to a little bit because six-hour rounds and people fighting is not something that I think I want to be around. Yeah. Yeah. I I fair enough. I I do think that there’s I think the game contains it all. And I think like, you know, it’s just it’s it’s there’s a there’s flavors and different, you know, there’s different niches within golf. There’s different identities within golf. I think that’s what makes it beautiful. I think that’s what makes it compelling. At the end of the day, it’s like the game itself can give so much back to you. And yeah, like a bunch of [ __ ] being borish, like fine that, but that’s part of life. you know, those people are around, they’re in society. You know, there are, I think, cathedrals for golf where where that respect exists and and but I don’t think you need to bring that to the MUN. I like the idea that like if you’re that golf can be casual, it can be fun. It can be something that is like pretty low stakes for you outside with your friends having a good time. Now, crossing over into fighting. Yeah, I guess that’s like, you know, I I don’t condone that at all. I don’t think anybody’s condoning fighting on the golf course. I do think you’re seeing a lot more of that because it’s easy for that stuff to go viral on social media. Um I I still want to call back to my favorite golf viral video of all time which is from the original jackass when he walks when they’re hiding in the woods with the air horn. Oh yeah. The guys are hitting on the T- box and he blows it and he says he sorry can’t help it cuz he has berscitis. Yeah. And he goes, “You have bcitis? You got to blow a horn.” And he goes, “It helps.” Johnny Knoxville. It’s the best. Uh, we used to do that because I lived on a golf course and yeah, people on number 11 at Old Delmmani. I’m sorry for that. Well, and see Wells, you’re still now, you know, you’re wearing slacks and looking good and tucking your shirt in. So, I I’m turning in to get off my lawn guy. That’s not cool. And you’re the cool Well, you are younger than me. I guess it’s fair. Yeah, it’s true. Um, this was a fun episode. Oh my god. So good. We’ve ripped through a lot. Um, yeah. Go ahead and uh, you know, like the episode, subscribe, all that stuff. Follow us on social media at the Vanityindexodcast and also on Scratch. Uh we’ll be back again next week, another amazing episode. Awesome. Thanks, buddy. See you. Fun.
4 Comments
Clooney is a turd.
i agree with you guys that kind is way funnier than santino just naturally
Even in the bang bang bang video that went viral, they were literally trying to get the guy to adhere to the traditions and gentleman nature of the sport, which is don't be a drunk ass hole holding up everyone behind them from playing.
I hear Wells' point though but largely agree with Chad.
Looking forward to this one. Such a funny guy, it'll be interesting to hear him talk golf…and other stuff.